By Aliker David Martin

November 16th, 2011

Fear makes the Wolf bigger

Are your fears making you unhappy? Do you worry so much and get depressed? Fear is in the mind. Our fears reflect our perspectives because we try to guard against our fears. A German proverb goes, “fear makes the wolf bigger than he is”. Some times in life, the fear of losing a loved one, or losing a job makes us depressed and unhappy even when we are far from being in danger. But these fears lead us to danger by clouding our sense of judgment. So how do we overcome our fears and avoid getting in to trouble?

While negative thoughts are like poison, positive thoughts are like medicine to the brain. Researchers at the National Institute of Health believe negative thoughts stimulate the areas of the brain involved in depression and anxiety. Our mind is made up of thoughts, beliefs and self-talk. According to scientists, we have about 60,000 thoughts a day. Approximately, 95 percent are thoughts you have had previously. What is startling is that 80 percent of these habitual thoughts are negative. Dr. Daniel Amen, a world-renowned psychiatrist calls them automatic negative thoughts. These means negative thoughts are responsible for our unhappiness.

The secret to your happiness is not trying to get rid of this negative thoughts but accepting that your thoughts are not always true. If we don’t believe everything we hear and we don’t believe everything we read; then we should not believe everything we think. Therefore, if fear is the wolf in us, then when we change our thinking to support our happiness, the wolf gets smaller.



  1. Fear is a CRAZY animal! This post so resonates – thank you Aliker.

    This is my ALL TIME Favorite quote ..

    And this is my AWAKENING moment that alerted me to it .. it happened last October 31st ..

    I have since knocked down fear many times!! 🙂

    I look forward to your posts!

    My Warmest Regards,

    ~ Doris Blanchet

    • gethappy says:

      Doris,am so grateful you liked my blogpost. Certainly, every week check out more blog posts on Happiness.Feel free to go through my previous posts as well.You could get moved with a few of my African context in writing.This has been my warmest feedback for the month.Thank you soo much

  2. […] Happiness: Change the Way You Think (happinessnest.wordpress.com) Share this:TwitterFacebookLike this:LikeBe the first to like this post. Posted in Life, Opinion and tagged Depression, God, Happiness, Jerusalem, Life, Musings, Random […]

  3. Kate Kresse says:

    Oh gosh, Dr. Amen is such a genius and a blessing. I’m glad you included his wisdom. Thanks for subscribing to my blog, too {the one at http://believeanyway.wordpress.com} . It seems we are kindred spirits.

  4. A Liker–clever name, great thought. Do you have any downloadable speeches, of the motivational sort? Thanks for reading my blog..

  5. jojopant says:

    “If we don’t believe everything we hear and we don’t believe everything we read; then we should not believe everything we think. ”
    Loved these lines. So simple and true, yet so difficult to understand and live.

  6. willowdot21 says:

    Hi Aliker thanks for a great uplifting read and thank you for following my blog. I am a little surprised as I do tend to tackle a lot of what you would call “Negative thoughts” I feel they have to met and dealt with head on. Fought with, dealt with. That said I agree with you totally Happiness is a huge tool I find sometimes if I pretend I am happy I can lift my mood and happiness spreads like a virus and that is good too! You are so right about worries and fears coming true my Mum always used to say “be careful what you wish for, you may get it!” and another of her wise sayings was “don’t wish your life away” wise words I think! I wish you well I wish you happy and I wish you power to your pen or keyboard!!

    • gethappy says:

      OMG Willow,
      I am humbled by these comments.These is the reason why I have these blog; to bring a smile on the face of any body who needs it.I can not appreciate you enough for comparing my thoughts with your mothers’ but i can only promise to have more post to bring these negative thoughts to smiles on your face.Lets keep in touch on social media.Thank you soooo Much. Another reason to keep writing.

  7. Karyl says:

    First of all, thanks for subscribing to my blog! I can’t wait to explore yours. I love reading about happiness – it makes me happy! I am reading The Happiness Project now. Have you checked out the blog? Although I am reading the book, I havent looked at the blog yet. Plan to do that today. Good luck to you!

  8. […] his views on happiness. You can read a great post of his on his site The Happiness Nest at link https://happinessnest.wordpress.com/2011/11/16/happiness-change-the-way-you-think/. He’s a motivational speaker, university educated in San Diego, though clearly he has an […]

    • gethappy says:

      Thanks so much. My morning is special because this is the first post I am reading this week.I appreciate the recommendation.Look out for other previous post as well.

  9. […] his views on happiness. You can read a great post of his on his site The Happiness Nest at linkhttps://happinessnest.wordpress.com/2011/11/16/happiness-change-the-way-you-think/. He’s a motivational speaker, university educated in San Diego, though clearly he has an […]

  10. I can`t tell you how…devine it seems to have stumbled upon your blog today. I`m not sure how you found my blog…but when I got the email and read, “gethappy“ I just had to come and visit. I am so glad I did. What an uplifting and enlightening post. Reading through the posts in your blog will welcome addition to this freshly diagnosed perfectionist`s day. Perfectionism is horrible and getting happy in healthy ways is the only way to cure it. Cheers!

    • gethappy says:

      You know, nothing lifts my spirits more than a feedback like this;I am so humbled by these complements and so inspired to keep writing.You make me feel like family online.I remain at your service in your search for happiness.I also admire your writing skills,will keep my eyes glued to your posts.

  11. Wow…I’ve been worried the past few days about so many different things that reading this is so comforting. It’s exactly what I needed to hear. Thanks!!

    • gethappy says:

      OMG, I call all these words blessings.Its my pleasure to be at your service whenever I can bring a smile to your face.Keep an eye on my page to keep a smile on your face.Thanks

  12. danroberson says:

    I’ve never heard someone say, “Hey, I love your frown,” or “you look beautiful when you scowl.”
    The world loves cheerful people because they lift the spirits of everyone. Thanks for your positive message.

  13. Shauna Smith says:

    This is so very true.. starting some positive thoughts and replacing those negatives (as many as you can) has made a huge difference in my life.. I now know Happiness is a choice and learned not an experience, just a way of life!!
    Thank you for this post!!

  14. clariice says:

    60,000 thoughts in a day – how does one get that number? For me, my thoughts roll around so quickly I dont even have time to keep count! Your blog looks really inspiring and I will definitely keep coming back for more 🙂

  15. I think it was Mary Murray Shelton in our interview about her book Guidance from the Darkness (belajohnson.podbean.com) who talked about the neural pathways in the brain that have been studied in neuroscience. The more we feed certain thoughts, the deeper the actual grooves in the brain become. Yet if we begin thinking other thoughts, in this case we’ll say more positive thoughts (which admittedly can be tougher on any given day – yet it ‘can’ be done), these grooves begin filling in and new pathways form.

    Interesting post Aliker, and thanks for visiting my blog 🙂

  16. justathinkin says:

    Oh goodness…yet another reason why I am thankful that I stumbled upon your presence today. I am thrilled to know you exist!

    Thankfully, I completely understand and accept my own “catastrophic thinking” and, at this point in my life…I find that my mind is a pretty hilarious place to be! But, watch out…that negativity monster will sneak up from behind…and, if you don’t knock it out…it just might bite ya’!

    Let’s say that one of my kiddo’s are not home when they are expected. Here’s a look into the mind of a Julie…

    A child is not home…a child is not home, yet? where is my child? did they have some school thing? did I forget? was I supposed to pick them up? did they get a ride from someone else? would they get in a strangers car? were they kidnapped?…AND THEN…I, purposely, recall the most obnoxious tantrum that this child has thrown which, ultimately, reminds me…

    Who in the heck would ever take that child?!?

    We are exactly who we are! Accept, love, cherish, respect and laugh at the real you. Life is so amazing…if you choose to be amazed!



    • gethappy says:

      Julie, I can tell from your words,you are on the right path to positive thinking.Its a process and I know you are better than when I read your post.Thanks for sharing that bit of experience with your child.

    • gethappy says:

      Julie, its great to know what my blog means to you.I am overwhelmed with joy since I received a blog post appreciating my post and what it means to you and your daughter.I can not thank you enough.Lets keep blogging to change lives

  17. carysoh1234 says:

    Thanks Aliker for checking out my blog and for “words of wisdom” on your blog. I enjoyed checking it out too!:)

  18. “The secret to your happiness is not trying to get rid of this negative thoughts but accepting that your thoughts are not always true.” Brilliant! I’m going to bookmark this post for the next time poisonous thoughts creep in.

  19. God is Good says:

    Great blog. Thoughts are very powerful – and many do not belong in our mind at all … the key is identifying the ones that do not align with who we truly are created to be and not entertaining them … which is why one of my life verses is:
    “Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication and with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all comprehension, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Phil 4:6) Then Paul exhorts us to focus on all that is good and pure and noteworthy … and so fill ourselves with the Goodness of God, because … God is Good, regardless of what is going on around us at the time. Blessings.

  20. Thanks so much for this; such true and wise advice! Stay happy! 🙂 Thanks for your visits, too!

  21. […] Happiness: Change the Way You Think (happinessnest.wordpress.com) […]

  22. Did you design the website this well with the default topic tools? Your page is incredible.

    • gethappy says:

      Thanks for liking my blog.I used the normal wordpress website options but I also continued to do a person research to redesign my blog and include things I thought was vital.It took me only time and commitment.I decided to click every link that mattered and used what I thought was important in my blog and ignored others.Thats what I have at no fee.Wordpress has so many offers for bloggers just that we have never adventured to learn more of what wordpress has to offer.Just take time and play around with the links and what it means.thanks

  23. As I often swim through the quicksand of perfectionism, fear often rears its ugly head. Often telling me that I haven’t met the heavenly expectations I have for this, and that. This post is the kind if thing that grounds me. Positive thinking puts that ray of sunshine in my day. Thanks for the great post. Thank you for visiting my blog too!

    • gethappy says:

      Wow, thanks for your strong sense of diction. You and I can fight fear and be the best that we can be if only we chose to keep a positive mind. Merry xmas and prosperous new year

  24. Dear Anlicker: Recently, I have been practicing gratitude everyday in an ongoing effort to generate positive thoughts. I recently watched “the secret” and am practicing the power of attraction. Perhaps this is how you found me. What a joy to see a blog titled the Happiness Nest. This tells me that something is working and that I am on the right track. Thank you for your work and I hope to see your thoughtful and positive comments on my blog.

    • gethappy says:

      If you seek happiness you will find. I am sure my blog will be a source of joy every time to check it out.Please take time to read my old posts because the ideas never get stale but keep the mind fresh with positive thoughts.Thanks for your complements my friend

  25. Bindu John says:

    Good suggestion – not to believe everything we think. We apply common sense and logical thinking in many other situations but not about our fears.
    And thank you for following my blog. Happy New Year!

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